A is for Ass

C is for Cat Bite

I had a feeling he would be weird, but was pleasantly surprised when our first date when well. We met for drinks, chatted, and then said good bye. I invited him on a pub crawl for the next Saturday. He called me just to chat.

He was sweet, but late for both our dates. 20 minutes for the second one, which was pretty inconsiderate because I had saved him a parking spot out front and was waiting outside for him to arrive. He showed up with a bunch of electronic equipment in plain view in his car, which is about the worst idea when one is parking in downtown Detroit. I gave him a sheet to cover it up. I will not be getting it back.

The pub crawl was fun at first. We chatted with people, even though he was rather awkward in social situations. He was way too into me - in that way that's just a bit too clingy and a bit too 7th grade.

The pub crawl came to an end, and, as planned, he came back to my place. He wasn't in any condition to drive. I went to the bathroom. When I came out he was holding his hand and dripping blood on the floor.

Apparently, Etta, my cat, bit him. He tried to pet her once, and when she hissed, growled, and tried to bite him the first time, he thought it would be a good idea to try again (because cats like him). Etta was in a state. He was trying to be tough and cool about it. I cleaned his injury and gave him a band aid.

We decided to watch a movie. He wanted to cuddle. He wanted to kiss me. These things are fine, but when I told him I don't want my clothes to come off, he proceeded to try to take them off. When I told him I didn't want to show him my breasts (or, as he called them, "boobies"), he pestered me about it. When I told him that I knew exactly where his cock was, and if I wanted to touch it, I would; he thought it was funny to try and force my hand into his pants. Then I told him I was pissed. He didn't get it. I should have kicked him out, but he was drunk and I didn't want a drunk guy driving. So, I rolled over and eventually he passed out. Once he did, I got up and slept on the couch. When I discovered this, he kind of freaked out and left. Because I was sleeping on the couch. Jesus fucking christ. He whined. He tried the puppy dog approach. I just wanted to kick him in the nuts.

posted by CV @ 6:50 PM